There are two moments in my life I will always remember. When I was four I knew I felt like and wanted to be a girl. I also knew this made my parents angry. But it wan’t until I was eight that I realised I had a big problem.

The Wedding

When I was eight I had to attend a family wedding. Everyone had to have a new outfit and for me they bought a blue suit.

I can still see that blue suit hanging from the top of my Mum’s wardrobe door. It was like a grown up suit just like all the men would wear.

I hated it. I didn’t want to try it on, I certainly didn’t want to wear it in public. I didn’t want to join the group and be just like all of the men wearing this suit or one like it.

But the thing I realised was, this was going to hurt me again in the future and the way I felt was going to be a big problem in my future.

I wore the suit …

Written by Beth

Behind a calm and friendly exterior I try every day to deal with a gender dysphoria I have had since I was four years old. I have never really known how to deal with it so have kept it to myself but have started a talking therapy and a blog to see if that helps.

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